bet he's never even heard Counting Crows

It's probably best this topic waited until after the game today, in hindsight. It just needs to be stated, it's too easy to just Pinpoint (!!!!) that that absolutely heinous red card's victim occupied the same position that Jermaine Jones happens to play. If only because Jones can't be guaranteed to have not made the same uncouth challenge as did Ricardo Clark on Gattuso. That's part of what makes JJ (as I'm presuming we here will soon take to calling him) and his capitalization on FIFA's new ruling so intriguing; his game is not American as per what was witnessed on the field against the Azzurri today, but instead features facets that would pull the US team closer to some sort of identity they've so lacked for so long.

Jones, in both alias and appearance, kind of just exudes "American". He looks more like an NBA player, complete with most of his tattoos done in English, and who at one time even had straight-up Chris Bosh hair. He plays a bit like a free safety in a Cover 2, complete with reckless abandon and constant caviling and running off at the mouth. I guess athletes from every pocket of the world say outlandish and/or inappropriate shit these days, but Jones does it in spades; he conveniently then just committed to a country wherein, God bless him, Chuck Barkley got arrested for getting behind the wheel drunk while Jonesing (shameless pun) for a hummer, careened through a stop sign, and came back to work even more beloved in but two months time.


None of this really means anything, I know. I like Ricardo Clark (and Mastroeni), I really do (and Mo Edu, too), but you'd have to be about halfway through a peyote trip to deny that JJones isn't an upgrade of some form in every aspect besides true Americanness, whatever the fuck that is. With him hopefully affixing severed heads upon wooden sticks in midfield and Michael Bradley frolicking around in face-painted glee right beside him - well, the US would have something there, albeit with a decent German influence. But it couldjustmaybefingerscrossed be with a twist couped from the American sporting quo; not just getting stuck in, but, for lack of more eloquent terms, getting stuck the fuck in. Like Kobe the last couple of years, or Bob Sanders at his best. It might be a tremendous pipe dream, and Jones probably isn't capable of the whole of it, but I have no problem taking greens with Jermaine (you know he would) and seeing you all on the other side. (pinpoint me, pirlo - where idioms go to be abused and die)

I've heard David Regis' name mentioned as a forebearer, but that shit's completely apples to oranges in my book. I don't think it's worth mentioning the difference between father and wife in terms of heritage, other than growing up a military brat, partially in Chicago - indeed, within the United States' borders - is far more qualification than a Walter Sobchak converting to Judaism for his ex-wife and her pomeranian. Jones is 27 years old - no spry chicken in footballing terms, but as a potential American citizen? Might as well be statutory that he can play for the US after three friendlies, but a) who really isn't all for demeaning the significance of the profligate friendly and b) if you were Bob Bradley, what other choice do you have? This "acquisition" doesn't guarantee anything for the Red White and Blue, but it does give them a devil-will-care machete with which to maneuver the South African jungle of the next calendar year.